The title of this post may seem a little crass but I think Epic would
have found it appropriate. He had a great sense of humor, which is in
itself an achievement that a lot people go their graves without reaching.
And I think he would think of it as a pity if we didn't recognize that.
This eulogy is late in coming because I hate writing eulogies,
particularly for people like Epic. I missed the funeral but from what I
heard it was a coming together of people. Not just people who knew Epic
when he died, but people from back in the day.
I first met Epic online back in the BBS days. And that, for the record,
is not just way back, but way way back.
It's tough to remember exactly where I first met Epic, but I think it
was on the Hell's Kitchen BBS run by Wynl in the early 90's. When I met
Epic he was a very friendly and super nice guy to have
around - thoughtful, punk as fuck, and a deep
thinker who seemed genuinely wanted peace in our lives. There were a
number of personalities on that BBS with very strong opinions on just
about everything, you had to survive the flame wars. When I got flamed
hard by people like Genet for holding teenage Marxist beliefs, Epic always
had my back.
Later, I started FCFF BBS, I asked Epic to be one of the first co-sysops
(co-adrics). He consistently posted and was among the people who were
among the hardcore forefront of the steadily growing underground digital
movement.
He was there for me. When I had a teenage crushes, Epic would
spend late nights with me on bbs chat sessions listening to me drone on.
Whether it was socialism or socializing, It made me feel
connected.
Somewhere along the way, I actually met Sean in person. He turned out to
be awesome: a cute, long haired, truck driving, take-no-shit, all around
great guy. In the heyday of BBS cafes, Sean was inextricably involved in
all of our nascent misadventures. Computers, the law, raves, riot night
(does anyone remember that?), psychedelic resurgence, paranoid
university sysadmins. When the Feds threatened to come to our door,
I remember Sean giving me the classic advice: "When the feds are at your
door, you MUST do the most painful thing for a hacker: ACT DUMB. Act like
you are a dumb hick from texas who doesn't know the first thing about
anything. Don't make snippy comments about the law and constitutional
liberties, and pretend that you are so dumb you will do anything they
say." Epic always managed to combine insight with a funloving attitude.
Over time, I lost touch with Sean, but our network continued be there
through this list.
Sean was part of a story - a story of a community whose seedling ideas
and nascent passions continue to flourish, mutate, and carry on to this
day. Epic isn't someone who was. He's someone who is. Is a part of us
-- is a part of that extended but tight-knit community that originated
back in the day. all of us have gone our own radically different ways
both literally and metaphorically. But the passion of those days lives on
in each of us. Some of us really were close to Epic while others knew him
only by his friendly posts. He was for me one of my early connections.
In losing him I have lost one of my roots -- one of my ties to that
community that was. I will deeply regret not seeing him at the next GT.
If Sean is out there somehow getting wifi in the sky,
your manner of being that made everything in the world seem calm,
collected, and cool. In the times when I was in
both his physical and virtual presence, he had a certain way about to me
was always comforting... Like the world could be ending and he would be
there saying "yo it's cool, just chill and it'll work it out." AS IF
it would fucking work out... at least that's what I thought at the time.
But Sean, it did work out... And your words made me feel a whole lot
better at a time I needed it the most. I'll miss you, I'll miss your
ability to see past personal insecurity and extend your friendship. I'll
miss your sense of well-being that you brought to us. Peace be with you
and your loved ones.
-----------------
